Okay, okay. This is actually the video I wanted to share last week. But I was afraid it would seem a little crass. I guess I had to work up my courage to share this with you.
Here goes…
Archive - November, 2008
A Happy Thanksgiving Gratitude List
We’ll take a break from the usual Springboard for Your Professional Life to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving.
Today I’m thankful.
I’m thankful for the life God has given me, both physically and spiritually through Jesus Christ.
I’m thankful for the 12 years I got to spend with my Mom.
I’m thankful for the nearly 27 years I got to spend with my Dad.
I’m thankful for the 23 years and counting I have been able to spend with Linda (my step-mom, for those of you who don’t know).
I’m thankful for the 14 years and counting I have been able to spend with Marita (my wife) and the fact that she puts up with me when I screw things up so badly. I’m also thankful that she has forgiven me every time I have had to ask her no matter how serious or trivial the offense.
I’m thankful for Brad and Christopher, my brothers. I’m thankful Brad still survives in Afghanistan and I’m thankful Christopher survived the motorcycle wreck earlier this year and that he is walking again.
I’m exceedingly thankful for the 11 years I’ve had with Tessa, the 9 years with Ethan, the 6 years with Ryan and the 1 year with Trina. I’m thankful they are all healthy and growing properly. I’m thankful that even though they have all been hurt at one time or another, none of them have been maimed or killed.
I’m thankful for every member of my family, including aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. (and even in-laws). I’m even thankful for the fusses, fights, feuds, troubles, hurts as well as the good times, the fun, the love because all of these things together have helped me be what I am. Certainly, I’m not exactly where I would like to be. However, I am exactly where God wants me to be and able to grow in that because of my experiences with my family.
I’m thankful for my grandparents, on both sides. Without their hard work, my parents would not have been what they were and I would not be what I am.
I’m thankful for my wife’s parents. Without them, I would have no wife. I’m thankful for the 13 years I was able to know to Steve Bobbitt (my father-in-law). I’m thankful for the great example he set for me as a father, husband, Christian and preacher. I’m thankful that he loved my wife so much. I’m thankful for the 14 years and counting I’ve known Leilani Baker and I look forward to better years to come.
I’m thankful for Adam, Seth and Rebekah, my wife’s brothers and sister. Recounting the memories they have created with Marita are some of the funnest times we have.
I’m thankful for my brother-in-law Nathan. His patience with me and his example as a preacher and Christian keep me humble and on the right track. I’m thankful for my sister-in-law Natalie. Her spiritual focus is an example for the entire family. I’m thankful for my sister-in-law Nicole. Without her I wouldn’t have my niece and nephew, Landon and Victoria.
I’m thankful for my health. I nearly died as an infant. I had about 10 surgeries before I was 10. But now, I’m getting along fine.
I’m thankful that I have never gone hungry, except by choice. I’ve never slept outside, except by choice. I’ve never had to walk where I’m going, except by choice.
I’m thankful I’ve been able to travel all over the U.S. and lived in England.
I’m thankful that I’ve met thousands of people whose tiny interactions have helped shape me.
I’m thankful for the numerous good friends who have patiently put up with me over the years. I want to list some, but I’m afraid I’ll neglect some on here and then I’ll be in trouble. You know who you are.
I’m thankful for the Franklin Church of Christ in Franklin, TN who let me preach for them each week despite how imperfect I am.
I’m thankful for all the mistakes I’ve made. I know, that is a bit surprising. However, it is the mistakes that have let me know I need Jesus. That is where I have found the most peace, serenity and happiness. Without my mistakes, I would still be simply relying on me.
I’m thankful for this opportunity to share my thanks with you.
For what are you thankful?
Edwin in Real Life: Look at Self before Giving Advice
Some friends were over last night and we watched Dan in Real Life for what must have been the 10th time for Marita and me. I just love that movie.
Granted, I have to say I don’t buy the Hollywood message that we really can know true love in just three days. I think Dan was right the first time when he said that was infatuation and not real love. On the other hand, real love can grow out of that infatuation if they work hard for the years to come.
However, what I really wanted to highlight in today’s Springboard for Your Family is how easy it is to give good advice and not really pay attention to it yourself.
Steve Carell plays Dan Burns, a widowed parenting advice columnist with three daughters. While at a yearly extended family weekend, he meets a woman at a bookstore and feels an immediate connection. When he gets back to the family house, he discovers this woman is actually his brother’s girlfriend. Then the fun really begins.
It’s a romantic comedy of errors as Dan tries to shut off his feelings for Marie and in the process breaks nearly every bit of advice he would offer parents with his own girls. I see me in Dan. Don’t get me wrong, I never wanted to date my brothers’ girlfriend (especially since my brothers are more than a decade younger than I am). But I do, sadly, often break the very advice I would offer others about how to relate to my wife and children.
Hey, this is about progress not perfection. But, at the same time, before we spend all our time telling everyone else how they should parent, taking their inventory about their relationships, we need to take our own inventory. In fact, before we tell our spouse how to live and behave to fix our marriage, we should look at how we are behaving. Before we tell our kids or parents how to behave, we should look at how we are behaving.
In the end, Dan finally gets the girl, makes amends with his daughters and gets the girl. His brother finds someone else and all is well for Dan in Real Life. Granted, real life doesn’t always work out so handsomely. But it will always come out better if we look at how we are behaving first.
Just for fun, here’s the trailer:
Boosting Your Courage to Spread the Gospel
I’m happy to share with you this guest column by Terry Francis, minister for the East Shelby Church of Christ in Collierville, Tennessee.
The Courage to Ask Her Out
I was never good at the game. I was the funny outgoing band geek that always played the role of “big brother” to the good looking girls. So while I was entertaining everyone, my friends were getting to know girls, collecting phone numbers, asking girls out, and dating. It wasn’t until I was a senior in High School that I finally mustered up the nerve to try to date. My mom would have liked it if I had waited longer I’m sure.
Looking back it’s funny to think about my friends who were playing the game. It was almost a competition to see how many girls they could talk to. It is still common for a group of guys to see who can get the most phone numbers I am told. It’s amazing how bold and confident people can be sometimes.
Another Kind of Courage
There have been times since I have been married that I had the same anxieties I experienced earlier in my pre-dating life. A waiter at a restaurant seems nice and interesting. I know I want to ask them something, but I hesitate. It’s not what you think. My wife is with me in those moments but she’s not what keeps me quiet. It’s my fear of rejection.
You see, there are times I meet a nice hard-working person in every day life and I think to myself, “I wonder if they are in a relationship with God. I wonder if they are saved.” Because of my fear—that same fear I had as a teenager—I sit back and say nothing. I drive away thinking, “I missed a great opportunity there! I should have said something.”
Sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ is far more important than dating. I wonder how effective we might be if we approached evangelism with the same gusto we did when we dove into the dating world. What if we collected phone numbers for Jesus? What if we tried to see how many personal studies we could set up?
Paul wrote, “For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek” (Romans 1:16). I need to realize the gospel is a better product than I ever was! My fears as a teenager in relation to girls were always “Am I good enough?” or “She’ll think I’m too fat” or “I’m too ugly for her.” My fears of rejection were based in a lack of confidence in me as a product. In short, I was ashamed of who I was. The gospel of Christ is perfect. There is no need to be ashamed. It is flawless. It fits everyone. I can go out and speak to everyone about the gospel with complete confidence.
The Springboard for Your Spiritual Life
I know what the problem is. It’s not that we think the gospel is inadequate. The problem goes back to me: “What if I say the wrong thing? What if I mess up? If they don’t agree to study with me, then I messed up.” Our job is to sow the seed (gospel) whether it grows and blooms into a mature plant or not. In the parable of the soils, three of the four types of ground did not accept the seed (Matthew 13:3–23). That means there will be more failures than successes. But that shouldn’t stop us. Our job is to sow the seed.
I must resolve that I have nothing to fear. Paul told Timothy God didn’t give us a timid spirit (2 Timothy 1:7). I must commit to exercising my power and love given to me by God to teach the gospel to all men.
May God help us all to speak up and teach the gospel of Jesus Christ.
The Perfect Christmas Gift
First, I want to thank you for following my Springboard for You blog. I know your time is valuable and the fact that you spend some of it keeping up with our lessons here means a lot to me.
Second, If I may be allowed just a small amount of marketing on this blog. You are probably aware of my other blog at giveattentiontoreading.com. The schedule for posting on giveattentiontoreading.com is based on my book by the same name.
Christmas is coming and so is the New Year. I’m sure many of your friends, like you and me, will be firing up their resolutions to improve their Bible reading and study. Why not provide them with the perfect Christmas gift that will help them keep that resolution this year? Give them their very own guide through the New Testament that allows them to study at their own depth and provides opportunity to discuss the Bible with others. Give Attention to Reading only costs $9.97. However, if you respond to me directly via e-mail (edwincrozier@streamsidesupplies.com) and purchase five or more, I’ll give you 15% off (that’s $8.50 per book).
Then tell them about giveattentiontoreading.com. On the first week in January, we’ll start reading our way through the New Testament all over again. It will be a great opportunity to learn from each other about God’s Word for our lives.
Let’s help our friends keep those resolutions this year.
Check out Give Attention to Reading today.
Thanks!
Find Your Dream through Your Own Struggles and Then Serve Others with What You Learned
Juli, Ben and Gordon Liske
Meet the Liskes
Can you imagine what it is like to listen to a doctor announce that a child you love with all your heart has a disability? Some of you don’t have to imagine, some of you know first hand.
I can imagine that there are basically three different approaches. 1) Ignore it and try to act like it might go away. 2) Turn to absolute despair and view it as a veritable death sentence. 3) Let it spark a passion of service in you. Option three is the choice Gordon and Juli Liske made.
On April 23, 2002, the Liskes learned their son Ben had autism. On top of that, there weren’t any good service centers near where they lived. What would they do? The Liskes took it upon themselves to study and figure out how to implement an educational approach that would help Ben grow. They had unprecedented success. In fact, “Today, at eight years old, Ben Liske is a National Young Scholar, a member of American Mensa Society, and an accomplished mathematician, artist and performing musician. Ben served as the poster child for the 2006 Autism Society of America “Voice of Autism” ad campaign.”
The Dream Becomes a Reality
The Liskes didn’t stop there. They didn’t just want to serve themselves, they wanted to serve others. Juli’s passion to help her son became a passion to help other children with autism and other parents of children with autism. The natural response? Write a book.
And so IN THE EYE OF THE HURRICANE
The Liske’s didn’t stop there. They began to take their message to other parents. Now, they are deeply immersed in the work of educating parents and helping children. Juli now speaks to groups all over the country about raising children with special needs and even just about raising children. Watch over the next several years as her demand as a speaker and educator increases.
It Just Keeps Growing
As if that wasn’t enough, the Liske’s didn’t stop there either. Within this past year the Liskes have taken their passion to the next step. In January 2009, they will be opening The Brown Center for Autism, Inc. in Nashville, a non-profit organization dedicated “to deliver an innovative, comprehensive, therapeutic experience to young children impacted by Autism Spectrum Disorders, by providing fully integrated and coordinated services in a truly caring environment.”
The Passion behind the Dream
The Liskes are personal friends and I am grateful to have had a part in helping them as they get the Brown Center established, opened and growing. Marita and I were talking to Gordon and Juli the other day about authorship and publishing. Juli said something that shows the key to their success. We were talking about her book and the future of other books when she said, “I wasn’t worried about royalties or becoming a best seller. As far as I was concerned, if one family got the book and it helped them, it would be worth the work.”
There’s your key. I don’t know how much financial income is getting to the Liskes because of the books, the counseling, the speaking engagements and the Brown Center. But I know they are successes. I know they feel like successes. Why? Not because of money, but because their life produced a dream and a passion. Instead of saying their dream would go nowhere so they needed to just stick with their traditional jobs, they pursued their passion as a team and look at where it is taking them–to a life filled with meaning and purpose which provides satisfaction whatever the financial rewards become.
Two Springboards for You
I’ve shared this first springboard before and I’ll probably do so over and over again, if you are trolling around for some idea that will make you lots of money, you will never have success–even if you make lots of money. Like the Rolling Stones you won’t be able to get no satisfaction. If you quit worrying about how much money you make and start following your dreams and passions and figure out a way to pursue them in service to others, whether you ever make lots of money or not, you will find success because you will find meaning and fulfillment.
The second springboard is about finding your dream and your passion. You’ve heard the cliche, “When life hands you lemons, make lemonade.” No doubt, you have faced troubles and struggles. You have probably had to overcome some issue without a great deal of help. All that help you wish you had and didn’t get translates into help thousands of others just like you wish they had. You can give it to them. Take the passion to overcome your own struggles and turn it into a dream to help others. You’ll be amazed at what you accomplish.
PS. Since posting this, Ben Liske was chosen to participate in a national Autism Self-Advocacy PSA sponsored by the Dan Marino Foundation. You can find the commercials here.
Families Need to Listen
I’m happy to offer you this guest article by Frederic Gray, leader of the Fathers of Faith, Daughters of Excellence Retreat.
Families Need to Listen
Have you ever had an event take place in your life and you knew you would never be the same? You knew because of some statement you heard, book you read or occurrence that took place you would never be the same. It has to me…several times. But I don’t think any of those moments have had quite the same impact on me as the one I will share with you now.
One day, my tenth grade health teacher, Mr. MacFarland, a former Mr. Minnesota, had us answer a series of questions on a sheet of paper. We did this exercise as individuals, quietly, but then we had to answer the questions out loud in front of the whole class. We went down each row in numerical order. When it came time for the question, “I am good at ________,” the girl whose turn it was said, “I am a good listener.”
Mr. MacFarland stopped the class. He said, “Everyone listen to what she said. If you are a good listener, you will never run out of friends.”
WHAT??? Could he be right???
You see, up until that time in my life, I was often very lonely, and had trouble making friends. I was socially awkward more often than not, and I desperately craved the friends everyone else seemed to have.
I HAD to test his theory. So I called a girl that I used to live next door to. After we got beyond, “So why did you call?” and, “Oh, I just called to say hi,” I had nothing to say. So I said the only thing I could think of. “So, um…are there any guys you like?” Boy, did I hit the magic button! She talked, and talked, and talked, and talked…you get the idea.
Two hours later, with me having said a handful of “huhs” and “wows,” she said, “This was fun. Call me tomorrow.”
From that moment on, my life has never been the same. My life changed instantly! From that day, my friends have continued to multiply exponentially. Girls instantly took an interest in me. Adults thought I was respectful. And children loved me. And all of this happened because I listened.
You can imagine my surprise when, after I became a Christian at age 21, I discovered that God actually commands people to be slow to speak and quick to listen. (James 1:19)
So what is the point of all of this?
Well, based on my personal observations and feedback from others, it seems to me the family is a place listening is often neglected. In the family, people often forsake proactive listening and focus on themselves.
Listening is powerful, almost magical. Listening proactively, especially within a family context where we have so many needs, can sooth someone’s anxiety, communicate love, serve as emotional affection, and serves as a calming salve for arguments (Proverbs 15:1).
In addition, when you begin to understand someone through proactive listening, it is much easier to give them the benefit of the doubt. Aren’t we a lot more forgiving when we understand where someone is coming from? Let’s take a look at each of our family members, and let’s be slow to speak, and quick to listen. Let’s change our families for the better by making our home a haven of understanding, rather than a web of mangled assumptions.
–Frederic Gray
“Be Good for Goodness’ Sake” the Atheists’ Pitfall
Doy Moyer got me thinking
Last week, Doy Moyer, had an outstanding post about a couple of new campaigns by atheists to evangelize their anti-God faith. He pointed out how contradictory and illogical this is because they want to talk about being good, but they have no standard for goodness. Who gets to decide what is good? Them? Me? I’m guessing they wouldn’t want me to be the standard of goodness.
This post got me thinking. There is an even more fundamental problem with this philosophy coming from atheists. Please understand, I too believe we should be good for goodness’ sake. I hunger and thirst for righteousness and do not simply want to be good so God won’t slap my hand or so I can get a reward in the end. I want to be good because I want to be good. Frankly, I’m glad to hear atheists do also.
Atheists’ have the same problem Christians do
The big problem is atheists face the same downfall I do. We have botched it and continue to botch it. I’m guessing every atheist, though he hates to hear his feelings so accurately expressed in the Bible, knows the exact feeling Paul expressed in Romans 7:15-24:
“…I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.
“So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am? Who will deliver me from this body of death?” (ESV).
Of course, I recognize atheists don’t believe in “the law of God” and therefore don’t have an objective standard of goodness. However, I’m sure each one has a personal standard of goodness. Whatever the standard, atheists who actually want to be good hit the same wall Christians hit. They want to be good. They have decided to be good. They long to be good. But they keep doing what they hate. Perhaps they decided they would quit coveting as Paul had decided. But they just keep going back to it. Perhaps they said they would stop their angry outbursts, but they just keep blowing up. Perhaps they said they would quit being arrogant, but their pride keeps rearing its ugly head.
Like Christians, they want to be good and they want to do it because being good is the right thing to do. Like Christians, they just can’t pull it off. They keep falling short at being completely good. Thus, they fuss at themselves and may even despair.
The Christians’ answer and the atheists despair
When Paul uttered his despairing cry, “Wretched man that I am? Who will deliver me from this body of death?” He had an answer: “Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord.”
The sad part for the atheists who finally have the courageous honesty to admit they just can’t reach their goodness goal is they have no answer to this dilemma. “Who will deliver me from this body of death?” All that comes back is eery silence. Or perhaps they say, “Me. I’ll do it.” But wait, didn’t you get you in this mess your in? What makes you think it will be any different tomorrow? Go ahead, keep relying on your own reserves of strength. Keep researching your own weakness and pain. When you finally get to the point of despair and the pain is finally too great, then perhaps you can turn to Paul’s answer. Once you finally run out of faith in yourself, maybe, just maybe you can start having some faith in God because if you will surrender to Him, He will deliver you. As you grow in Him, you will become good for goodness’ sake. It will take time. It is about progress, not perfection. But in God, there is hope and He is waiting for you, giving you time to realize He is where your hope for being good for goodness’ sake really is.
So, for my part, I hope atheists keep pressing their “good for goodness’ sake” campaign. Sooner or later that will drive them to despair. Then because they have increased their desire and hunger for goodness, some of them will begin to realize they can only accomplish their goal if they surrender themselves to God.
Christians need to learn this too
Of course and sadly, there are many Christians that need to learn this lesson as well. If we are seeking goodness as a means to merely avoid hell or be rewarded with heaven, we will likely fall short. That leads to a legalistic approach of trying to figure how much is enough and what are the rules to help earn your way to the reward. That simply won’t cut it. Instead, if you want to be good because you hunger and thirst for righteousness, you will learn you can’t make it unless you just surrender to God. Then you will be seeking God’s way, not to earn your way out of hell or into heaven, but rather to simply be like God recognizing God’s way works.
Things You Don’t Say to Your Wife by Tim Hawkins
I know I rely pretty heavily on Tim Hawkins
Have fun.
Check Out My Latest Class Material
Check Out My Most Popular Workbook
Check Out My Stuff
