Guys, I know you’ve wondered what to do when she asks that all important question, “Why do you love me?” Rhett and Link give us some helpful advice.
Go get her guys. You’re armed and dangerous.
Have fun.
Archive - February, 2009
The Oz Principle: A 4 Point Plan to Achieve New Levels of Performance
For a moment, let’s pretend you work in the kitchen of a cruise liner. One day, as you go into the storage room for some supplies, you notice a leak. Water is spraying in. What do you do? Of course, you do nothing. It’s not your job to fix leaks. It’s not even your job to monitor for leaks. Or, you file a report that will go into stack of papers for the captain to look at. That way, if something really bad happens, at least you’re covered and no one can blame you. A few hours later, the ship sinks. As you are pulled underwater with it, you last words are, “It’s not my fault. It wasn’t my job.”
Does that make a lick of sense? Obviously not. Yet, that is the kind of approach people take on the job all day long according to Roger Connors, Tom Smith and Craig Hickman in their awesome book, The Oz Principle: Getting Results through Individual and Organizational Accountability
They define the six aspects of the Victim Cycle.
- Wait and See: Don’t do anything about the problem you noticed. Just wait and see what will happen.
- Confusion and Tell Me What: “I don’t know what’s going on, if someone would just tell me what to do, I’ll do it.”
- It’s Not My Job: Thank you unions for this one. We don’t want to step over job lines. I don’t want to be accused of doing someone else’s job, so I’ll just let the ship sink. As I drown, at least I’ll know I didn’t step over any boundaries.
- Cover Your Tail: “Hey, I filed a report, I can’t help it if you all didn’t do anything about it. It’s not my fault.”
- Finger Pointing: We’re all experts at knowing why everything is someone else’s fault.
- Ignore and Deny: This will get us back to “Wait and See.” “I don’t see a problem. What problem do you see?”
However, they also point out that we can be above the line of this victim cycle and instead pursue the accountability cycle. The book is called The Oz Principle
We can learn from these characters that we must…
- Develop courage to see the problems (the not so cowardly lion).
- Develop heart to own the problems (the tinman with a heart).
- Develop brains and wisdom to solve the problems (the wise scarecrow).
- Develop the willingness to exercise the means to do what we’ve planned (Dorothy).
If you want to go places in your career, if you want to take your company to higher levels, learn to rise above the victim line and live in the accountability cycle.
The #1 Rule to Remember in a Disagreement/Argument
If you’re married and/or have kids, you’re going to have disagreements. There’s no way to get around them. They will happen so get ready. I want to share with you the #1 rule I’ve learned will help you get through all your disagreements. Of course, it takes way more than knowing this rule, you have to apply it. I’ve known it a long time. I’m not always the best at applying it.
Sadly, if I forget to apply this rule while in an argument, I lose focus of what’s most important. My goal becomes to win the argument. Winning means either to get my way, prove I’m right, or just get whoever is disagreeing with me to shut up. It’s also an extra bonus if I force them to have to admit I was right and they were wrong and then hold it over their heads for a while.
Are you seeing where this relationship is going? When this is going on, I may be winning the battles, but I’m losing the relationship. After several of these adventures, the person on the other end of the disagreement just wants to get away from me. Whether it’s Marita, my kids, my extended family, or friends.
So, what’s the #1 rule?
Keep the relationship the main thing.
That’s right, even in the heat of the argument I need to remember that the most important thing is the relationship, not winning the argument, not proving my point, not shutting the other person up, not getting gloating rights, not venting my frustrations, not putting them in their place. The number one thing is growing closer to the person with whom I’m arguing. Yes, even a disagreement can result in closer union and more emotional intimacy.
When we get into a disagreement, we need to remember that in a little while that conversation will be over, the decision will be made, and we’ll still have to live with the person at the other end. Do we really want to live with the result of raging so much we made them cry? Do we really want them walking away saying, “There’s no talking to him/her”? Do we really want them hurt or embittered because of the names we called them? Do we really want them wilting inside thinking they can’t ever talk to us because we don’t fight fair?
When I feel myself getting tensed up, when I hear my voice raising in pitch and volume, when I sense my temperature rising, I need to breath deeply, remind myself what is most important. When this disagreement is dealt with, I want my relationship with the other person to be stronger, deeper, closer. Then I need to ask, how can I listen to their point of view and also express mine in a way that will accomplish that?
Above all, I need to…
Keep the relationship the main thing.
The Dayenu: A Prayer of Thanksgiving
Thanks to Lori in Pennsylvania for putting me on to this great prayer. According to Wikipedia, it is a prayer the Jews offer as part of their Passover celebration. It is called Dayenu which essentially means “it would have sufficed.” It contains a series of statements about God’s blessings claiming each blessing would have been enough if God had only given that blessing, but He didn’t only give that blessing; He gave more.
This week I’m going to share the prayer with you. My plan is to write my own for next week. Maybe you can write one as well and share it with us in our Springboard for Your Spiritual Life.
If He had brought us out of Egypt, and not carried out judgments against them–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had carried out judgments against them, and not against their idols–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had destroyed their idols, and had not smitten their first-born–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had smitten their firstborn ,and had not given us their wealth–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had given us their wealth, and had not split the sea for us–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had split the sea for us, and had not taken us through it on dry land–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had taken us through the sea on dry land, and had not drowned our oppressors in it–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had drown our oppressors in it, and had not supplied our needs in the desert for forty years–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had supplied our needs in the desert for forty years, and had not fed us the manna–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had fed us manna, and had not given us the Shabbat–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had given us the Shabbat, and had not brought us before Mount Sinai–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had brought us before Mount Sinai, and had not given us the Torah–Dayenu, it would have sufficed.
If He had given us the Torah, and had not brought us into the land of Israel–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had brought us into the land of Israel, and not built for us the Holy Temple–Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
What a great form and model of a thanksgiving prayer. I hope it motivates you as it does me.
6 Rules to Decide if What You’re Doing is Ethical
Let’s play a word association game. I’ll list some words and you tell me what comes to mind that they all have in common. Enron. Worldcom. Martha Stewart. And, if you follow my friend Bill Seaver’s podcast, Belkin. When you heard these names together, did you think of deceit, fraud, misappropriation of funds, lying, stealing, cheating?
Ethics is a major issue these days. I love the title of John Maxwell’s book and his reason for giving it this title–There’s No Such Thing As Business Ethics
Rule #1: The Golden Rule
Do to others what you would have others do to you. We’ve all heard it. I know folks have tried to improve upon it by making up The Platinum Rule
. However, that merely demonstrated they did not fully understand the Golden Rule. Obviously, I want others to consider what I want. I should do the same for them. But instead of being distracted by competing rules, let’s just get back to what we’ve always known this meant.
If roles were reversed, would you want the person you are dealing with to do what you are about to do? How do you want people to treat you? With honesty, integrity, kindness, and respect? How are you treating them? Do you want folks to be sincere with you? Do you want others to give you the benefit of the doubt? Do you want others to give their best for you? Are you doing that for them?
Maybe you can’t find an actual bylaw that says what you are about to do is wrong. Maybe the law would never be able to punish you for what you are about to do. However, if you’re treating someone the way you’d hate to be treated, then you’re not being ethical.
Rule #2: The Honesty Rule
Is what you are doing, saying, or representing completely, totally, rigorously honest? I know I’ve been tempted on this before. I want to sell my car but the air conditioner is messed up. It has a short somewhere. Sometimes it works; sometimes it doesn’t. My temptation when someone drives it and the air works is to just let it go. I can always fake it later. “Well you got to drive it, did it work then?” But that is just not honest. There is no way around it. I’m tacitly lying when I do that. Why do you think real estate agents make sellers write up a full disclosure and sign it? Because they don’t want to be involved in some unethical dealing.
Too many people try to come up with loopholes. Like children, they seem to think they can cross their fingers and let a little fib slip. If you want to be ethical, you have to tell the truth. Be rigorously honest, even if it gets you in trouble. Trust me, in time, people will learn to appreciate your honesty.
Rule #3: The Extra-Mile Rule
If I’m just trying to get by with the least possible amount of effort I can give, I’m not being ethical. My boss has hired me to do the best possible job I can give him. He hasn’t hired me so I can do just enough to get by. I need to go the extra mile. I need to give that extra effort. I need to do my best and then some. I need to give a little more, go a little farther, push a little harder.
The fact is, I’m stealing from my bosses when I’m only giving them half the effort they are paying for. Instead, I should be giving to them by giving them more effort than they are paying for. Of course, there will often be a payoff for me in this. When I’m giving more effort, they’ll often see it and start paying for it.
Rule #4: The Time Management Rule
Here’s the heart of it. If my boss is paying me for 40 hours work, but I only gave him 30 hours work stretched into 40, I’m not being ethical. I need to make the most of my time. I need to act like time is money and invest it wisely. If I’m wasting my time in the company, I’m wasting my boss’s/client’s money.
Each moment past is gone forever. I can never relive the minutes I’ve let slip by. I can never give those minutes back to my bosses or clients. Then when I take money for those wasted minutes, I’m practically stealing from them.
Rule #5: The Consistency Rule
Sadly, many folks rank ethics on a sliding scale. It is as if they are being asked the question: “On a scale of 1 to 5, how ethical are you? 5 means completely ethical. 4 somewhat ethical. 3 averagely ethical. 2 hardly ethical. 1 never ethical.” It just doesn’t work that way. We’re either ethical or we’re not.
I’m not saying any of us are perfect. I’m not saying we never make mistakes. I’m not saying we never fail to meet our grand intentions. However, if I’m constantly lying to my employees, I don’t get to declare I’m ethical just because I’ve never lied to my customers. However, I’ll point out if you really think both of those statements are true, you’re probably lying to yourself. Just because you tell the truth the 95% of the time it won’t affect you adversely, you’re not mostly ethical. If you lie when backed into a corner, you’re not ethical.
Remember that this checklist is my checklist for determining if I’m ethical. I have no doubt everyone, no matter their view of spirituality, agrees with the rules I’ve listed so far. Some may not agree with this final rule because it will appear too Christian or Bible based. Sometimes we seem to have the idea that the Bible is for church not our professional lives. I can’t take the Bible out of any of my life. I will point out that if you have agreed with the above 5 rules, you have agreed with very Bible based rules. I have to share my sixth rule because these are my rules for determining if I’m being ethical. You may not want to follow this last one, but I assure you, it will make you ethical if you do.
Rule #6: The Bottom Line Rule
Most often, we associate the bottom line with money because that’s where the phrase originated. However, it has come to mean what is most important. If someone says, “The bottom line is…” we expect them to tell us the most important part of whatever they are sharing. For most folks, the bottom line does have to do with money. For some it has to do with fame. For others with influence and popularity. For some, the bottom line is receiving the credit or passing the blame.
For me, the bottom line comes directly from Matthew 6:33. “Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness.” I have to ask with every decision is this the next right thing? Is this what God would want me to do? That’s my bottom line. It doesn’t matter how much money it will make me or how famous it will make me. If I can’t be convinced God wants me to do it, then, for me, it just isn’t ethical.
Of course, to truly follow this rule, I have to go back to my honesty rule. It’s amazing the number of ways I can declare God wants me to do something and in the end I realize it was just me wanting to do it. But that is for another post–probably a Monday post.
There you have it. My six rules for determining if I’m acting ethically. I hope it helps you. I hope we can each make an individual difference in our work place, shining the light of ethical living for all to see and leading our business world away from the sad state of ethicless actions by placing doing good things above doing profitable things. In the end, I think we’ll find doing good is actually more profitable anyway.
Need Help Being Ready for the Analog to Digital Switch? Watch this Video
I know this is usually my family day. However, tonight’s the night. The last chance to get ready for the analog to digital switch. I wanted to make sure you were all prepared, so here’s a video from Spike Feresten to help you get it right.
I hope that helped.
Sorry that the video has been removed. I certainly never intended to violate anyone’s copyright, but assumed because it had been put on YouTube that had all been dealt with.
I will ask this, when will these companies realize that putting these up on YouTube is better advertising than they can get anywhere else. How many people would have checked out the television show it came from? Oh well, I guess some folks will never learn to keep from killing the goose that laid the golden eggs.
Alcohol: The Gateway Sin
Alright, alright, I don’t want to get into a huge debate about whether or not a single drink of alcohol is a sin. We can talk about that later. I’ve just talked to several people over the past few weeks who keep having trouble with various sins and it these stories keep starting with one problem–alcohol. So, I thought I’d share Ephesians 5:18 with you.
“And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit” (ESV).
The Greek Word for Drunk
I’m not a Greek scholar, but what I’ve read says the word translated “drunk” here is “methusko.” According to Vine’s, this is special form of the word “methuo” which means to be filled and in the context of intoxicating drink means to be drunk. The special form is called the inceptive form. Vine’s goes on to say that this special form marks the process of the verb. That is, it is not talking about the end result but the process. (Vine’s Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words, p 343.). Webster’s Dictionary defines “inceptive” as “expressing the beginning of the action indicated by the underlying verb, …” Abbot-Smith’s Manual Greek Lexicon of the New Testamentclaims “methusko” is “causal of [methuo]” (T&T Clark, Edinburgh, Scotland. 1973, p 282.). Bullinger’s A Critical Lexicon and Concordance To the English and Greek New Testament says “methusko” means “to grow drunk (marking the beginning of No. 1 [methuo])” (Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids. 1978. P 238.).
I think this should give us a bit of a pause before we bottoms up. God addresses not just the end result, but the process from beginning to end.
Don’t Be Drunk, Be Filled with the Spirit
God didn’t just say don’t be drunk with wine. He offered an alternative. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Sadly, many charismatic teachers have taken this all wrong and believed Paul was saying being in the Spirit meant you would act like you were drunk.
That totally misses the point. He says don’t be drunk with wine because there is debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Why? Because you’ll act completely differently when you are filled with the Spirit than if you are filled with wine. Being filled with the Spirit does not mean you will act like a drunken fool. Being filled with the Spirit means you will act with the wisdom of the Spirit (cf. Ephesians 5:15-17).
However, notice Paul’s point in context. Instead of starting the process of be filled with wine, Paul says we should be filled with the Spirit. The contrasting point is to the degree we pursue the process of being filled with wine, we will not be filled with the Spirit. This is important because the Scripture repeatedly points out we must be filled with, led by and follow the Spirit (e.g. Romans 8:5-9; Galatians 5:16-25).
Scientifically, we know the very first things intoxicants attack are our judgment, willpower, discernment and inhibitions. Things we would never do under normal circumstances, we will do once alcohol gets into our system. Rage, fornication, theft, violence and so one easily follow once we start drinking the lubricant for sin.
This hearkens back to Proverbs 31:4-5, in which Lemuel’s mother told him not to drink lest he drink and forget the law. That is exactly what happens when we drink alcohol.
Alcohol: The Gateway Sin
In reality, even if you want to say that a glass of wine over the holidays is okay, can you at least see what Paul explains here? Alcohol in any amount is dangerous. To the degree you let it into your system, you hinder the work of the Spirit to guide you to life. Sadly, I’ve seen way too many people fall prey to all kinds of sins because they started saying they could handle a bit of alcohol.
I’m sure dozens of people can say, “I’ve had a drink and I haven’t done those things.” Fine. I can’t answer for everyone. My point is simply this, Paul says it is a gateway to abandoning the Spirit. If you want life through the Spirit, put the booze down. Don’t defend it. Don’t take it up. Set it down. Walk away. Fill yourself with the Spirit instead. That’s where life is.
Social Media Only Works When You Have Something Valuable to Say
Today’s springboard for your professional life is a guest post by Bill Seaver of MicroExplosion Media. He has been a big springboard for me and my blog. I wanted to give him the opportunity to be a springboard for you. Thanks for this, Bill.
By the way, after his post, I’ve added in a couple of interviews Bill conducted with clients of his. These are great intros to blogging and how blogging can be a real springboard for your professional life. The first is with a CPA, the second a gunsmith. Check them out.
Enjoy!
Social Media Only Works When You Have Something Valuable to Say
I’d like to thank Edwin for the opportunity to provide this guest post on his blog. As I’ve gotten to know Edwin over the last several months, I have been very impressed with his ability to turn out good content on a regular basis. He was born to blog.
Most people won’t have as much to say as a prolific blogger like Edwin; they could think that makes them unqualified or unable to blog. I don’t buy that. The guy who has eight things to say a week may appear to be a better blogger than someone who only blogs once a week, but quantity doesn’t trump quality.
It’s easy to be intimidated by someone who’s prolific, but there is no reason to. Some high output bloggers, like Edwin, have the unique gift of quantity and quality, but that is an exception. Most people who are too focused on high quantity posts tend to produce poor quality posts. One really good post a week is much better than five average posts. The key is having something to say that’s really valuable to the people you want to reach and not just saying something because you feel like you’re due to blog again.
So how will you know if you have something valuable to say? Start with these:
- If you have truth to share, you have something to say.
- If you have an experience to draw from, you have something to say.
- If you know something I should know, you have something to say.
- If you can tell me about someone I should meet, you have something to say.
- If you have perspective where I am lacking, you have something to say.
The bottom line is to focus on great content. Great content in small doses is much better than average content in large doses. I think a portion of a C.S. Lewis quote (out of context) is pretty fitting here. Don’t settle “like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
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