Ephesians 5:15-16 says, “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” Making the most of our time is essential for us these days. We are so busy, flitting from here to there, church, work, school, PTA, clubs, sports, and on the list goes.
Through all of this, we spend a lot of time alone in our cars. That time can be wasted or it can be invested. Here are 6 ways to invest and redeem your commute time. Continue Reading…
***Warning: As per some new legal code, I must inform you that this post is filled with affiliate links. Yes, that means if you click on them and buy something, I’ll receive a referral commission. Please, my kids need to eat this week. Buy something. Not to mention, I’m telling you about this stuff because it will really help you.
The authors of one of my all time favorite books, Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High
Check it out as Vitalsmart’s junior scientist, Hyrum Grenny, works on getting kids to wash their hands before they eat their snack.
In Matthew 25:14-30, the master gave talents to his three servants. One of them received only one talent and he was filled with fear. He wasn’t sure he could accomplish anything with the one talent, so he didn’t try anything. When the master returned, the slave tried to explain that really he was doing the master a favor. He could have messed up and lost the talent, but instead he had saved it for him. The master judged the slave.
Too often we have the same problem today. We are so afraid we are going to fail in serving God, do something wrong, mess up and cause more harm than good that we don’t ever do anything. We go through so many excuses about why so many things won’t work that we never work. Guess what. That doesn’t work.
Don’t be afraid to fail. At least do something. Maybe you will fail, but if you don’t ever do anything you know God will judge you for sure.
Remember, God works when His people work. Abandon your fears and get to work.
(If you have stumbled across this post, you have found me blogging my upcoming book “Getting to Did: How To Lose Your Big But and Live a Life Without Regret.” In the last installment, Sam learned “You SHALL Prioritize” If you need to catch up on the whole book, you can start with “Sam’s Crumbling World” which has an index of all the posts or you can follow the successive links.)
Sam had a great week. He began by sitting down with his 17 year old son, Scott.
“Son, I want to talk to you about college…”
“Look, Dad,” Scott interjected, “I’m tired of arguing about this with you. I wish you’d just leave me alone about it. I don’t want to go to your school and I’m not sure I even want to go to school period.”
Sam took a deep, steadying breath, and said, “I know, and that’s okay with me.”
“What!?” Scott said with a double take at his dad. Then with a knowing smile, “Okay Dad, what self-help, get what you want out of your kids, parenting book are you trying to use on me this week?”
“None,” Sam said with a guess-I-deserved-that smile, “I’ve been talking with a couple of friends who’ve helped me see myself a little better. It’s not fair or right of me to expect you to be me. You SHOULD be you. Don’t get me wrong, nothing would make me happier than you going to my old school. And I still think it’s a great choice. But the choice is yours, not mine. I just want you to know that whatever choices you make, so long as I don’t think they are immoral, I WILL support you in them. Further, no matter what choices you make, even if I can’t support them, I WILL always love you.”
Scott just sat there looking shocked. Sam smiled and said, “If you want to talk to me more about what you plan to do after high school, just let me know. I love you, Scott.” He hugged his son and then left Scott in stunned silence.
The most amazing thing about this was it lifted a great weight off Sam’s shoulders. Realizing this choice was Scott’s and not his meant he didn’t have to worry about it anymore.
Further, even though Scott had not yet taken Sam up on his offer to talk more about his post-graduation plans, he was now talking to him with the warmth and respect he had before the college rift occurred.
While Sam was still in contact with his recruiter and keeping his eyes open for a good job opportunity, he was also developing plans to start his own business. Sam knew most people would think he was nuts starting his own landscaping business. After all, he thought, how many people actually like cutting grass and trimming shrubs? Yet, he did.
On top of that, he was actually excited about it. What made him most excited was that, for him, this wasn’t really about making money, though he was honest and down to earth enough to know he did have to do that. His real thought was what his neighborhood would look like if he were able to take care of the landscaping. Further, he thought of all the people he could serve because they didn’t like cutting the grass and digging flower beds.
There was no doubt about it, Sam was excited. He couldn’t wait to meet with Dave’s third friend—the COACH, whatever that was supposed to mean.
*****
The day finally arrived. Sam was waiting in Dave’s driveway as the garage door lifted. He got in the car and said, “I’m ready for The Early Bird.”
Dave chuckled and headed down the now familiar road to his favorite coffee and breakfast spot. “How’s your week been? You seem a little more up than two weeks ago.”
“I’m on fire this week. I can’t wait to meet your COACH friend and learn how to get from WOULDA to WILL.”
They pulled into The Early Bird parking lot and walked in, talking jovially. As they entered, Tammy and Melinda chimed, “Hey Dave. Hey Sam.” Melinda added, “We have some great coffee cake today. You SHOULD branch out and try it.”
“I SHOULD huh,” Sam smiled and winked at Dave. “Well, if you say so, I guess I SHALL.”
As they waited for their coffee and breakfast, Sam recognized his oldest son’s high school football coach sitting at the back table. “Is he your COACH?” he asked.
“That’s him,” Dave replied.
“You know, he’s the winningest coach in our school’s history.”
“I know,” Dave responded.
As they walked to the table, the COACH jumped up and grabbed Sam’s hand, shaking it vigorously. “Hey Sam, I wondered if you were the Sam Dave had been talking about. I sure miss Sam, Jr. He helped make my first couple of years easy. I was always surprised he didn’t stick with it in college. But, I guess each of us SHOULD do what we think is best.”
“That’s right,” Dave interjected. “Not to change the subject, but what do you think about your upcoming season?”
They spent the next few minutes talking about football, their chances of winning State again, and generally just shooting the breeze.
Finally, Dave stood up and said, “Well guys, it’s great looking into our local sports future, however, it’s time for me to hit the road. I have my own future to work on today and so do you Sam.”
He shook the COACH’S hand, turned to Melinda and said, “Can I have a piece of that coffee cake to go, please? Deborah will love it. Make it two, she doesn’t have to know I ate one here.” He received his order, waved goodbye to Sam and the COACH and headed out the door.
Sam turned to the COACH, “I had no idea you were the COACH Dave was talking about. I would have called you last week if I had. What’s your connection with Dave?”
“That’s a long story, Sam. Let’s just say he helped me get through a tough time when I thought about giving up. He helped me get my WOULDA to WILL and has helped me keep it there ever since. If I didn’t think the school board would cut my salary and give half of it to him, I’d let them know how much his influence has actually made our team what it is.”
The COACH drained his coffee cup and then continued, “Let’s get’r done. We’ve got a lot to talk about and I want to do it on familiar turf.”
*****
The COACH took Sam to the high school. Instead of going to an office, he walked him onto the football field and said, “This is my sanctuary right here. This is always right. Struggle, survival, victory, and defeat. It’s just a game, but I love it.”
Sam laughed, “Isn’t that from Remember the Titans?”
The COACH coughed slightly and said, “Yeah. Well…I’ve always wanted to say that. Anyway, let’s get started. Head to the locker room. You remember where it is, don’t you?”
As they walked, the COACH kept talking, “My job is to help you turn your WOULDAS into WILLS. Far too often there are all kinds of things we think we WOULD do, BUT something gets in the way. Looking back, we WOULDA studied harder in college, BUT we didn’t know how important it was. We WOULDA saved more money for retirement, BUT it was too hard to make ends meet. We WOULDA gone further in our career, BUT it seemed like our boss was out to get us. WOULDA, WOULDA, WOULDA, before long our lives are just one big BUT.
“Up to this point you have learned what you CAN do; that was the TRAINER’S job. You have also learned what you really SHOULD do or as we say, SHALL do; that was the PROFESSOR’S job. Now we merge those two and focus on following through with what you WILL do. Are you ready?”
“I was ready last week. Let’s get this show on the road,” Sam answered as they walked into the locker room.
“The keys I’m going to teach you are the same ones I pass on to my football team. Take a look at the sign above the door. My guys see it every time they head out to the field.”
Sam turned around and looked up to see a sign that read:
“That’s great for football,” Sam retorted, “but what does that have to do with me? Wait…let me guess—you have a card that explains it.”
The COACH laughed and pulled a card out of a small rack on the wall beside the door. It read:
“What is it with you people and acrostics?” Sam quipped.
“They make life fun. Who knows? Maybe one day Dave will write a book about GETTING TO DID and all the hard work will already be done. Anyway, this is the key to turning your WOULDAS into WILLS. This is the key to maintaining motivation.”
“Alright, what does it mean? I’m not sure I like the sound of ‘Yes Men,’” Sam replied.
“We’ll get to them in a minute.
(Come back next Thursday as the COACH teaches Sam about Passion.)
This post does contain affiliate links.
Let’s play a word association game. I’ll list some words and you tell me what comes to mind that they all have in common. Enron. Worldcom. Martha Stewart. And, if you follow my friend Bill Seaver’s podcast, Belkin. When you heard these names together, did you think of deceit, fraud, misappropriation of funds, lying, stealing, cheating?
Ethics is a major issue these days. I love the title of John Maxwell’s book and his reason for giving it this title–There’s No Such Thing As Business Ethics
Rule #1: The Golden Rule
Do to others what you would have others do to you. We’ve all heard it. I know folks have tried to improve upon it by making up The Platinum Rule
. However, that merely demonstrated they did not fully understand the Golden Rule. Obviously, I want others to consider what I want. I should do the same for them. But instead of being distracted by competing rules, let’s just get back to what we’ve always known this meant.
If roles were reversed, would you want the person you are dealing with to do what you are about to do? How do you want people to treat you? With honesty, integrity, kindness, and respect? How are you treating them? Do you want folks to be sincere with you? Do you want others to give you the benefit of the doubt? Do you want others to give their best for you? Are you doing that for them?
Maybe you can’t find an actual bylaw that says what you are about to do is wrong. Maybe the law would never be able to punish you for what you are about to do. However, if you’re treating someone the way you’d hate to be treated, then you’re not being ethical.
Rule #2: The Honesty Rule
Is what you are doing, saying, or representing completely, totally, rigorously honest? I know I’ve been tempted on this before. I want to sell my car but the air conditioner is messed up. It has a short somewhere. Sometimes it works; sometimes it doesn’t. My temptation when someone drives it and the air works is to just let it go. I can always fake it later. “Well you got to drive it, did it work then?” But that is just not honest. There is no way around it. I’m tacitly lying when I do that. Why do you think real estate agents make sellers write up a full disclosure and sign it? Because they don’t want to be involved in some unethical dealing.
Too many people try to come up with loopholes. Like children, they seem to think they can cross their fingers and let a little fib slip. If you want to be ethical, you have to tell the truth. Be rigorously honest, even if it gets you in trouble. Trust me, in time, people will learn to appreciate your honesty.
Rule #3: The Extra-Mile Rule
If I’m just trying to get by with the least possible amount of effort I can give, I’m not being ethical. My boss has hired me to do the best possible job I can give him. He hasn’t hired me so I can do just enough to get by. I need to go the extra mile. I need to give that extra effort. I need to do my best and then some. I need to give a little more, go a little farther, push a little harder.
The fact is, I’m stealing from my bosses when I’m only giving them half the effort they are paying for. Instead, I should be giving to them by giving them more effort than they are paying for. Of course, there will often be a payoff for me in this. When I’m giving more effort, they’ll often see it and start paying for it.
Rule #4: The Time Management Rule
Here’s the heart of it. If my boss is paying me for 40 hours work, but I only gave him 30 hours work stretched into 40, I’m not being ethical. I need to make the most of my time. I need to act like time is money and invest it wisely. If I’m wasting my time in the company, I’m wasting my boss’s/client’s money.
Each moment past is gone forever. I can never relive the minutes I’ve let slip by. I can never give those minutes back to my bosses or clients. Then when I take money for those wasted minutes, I’m practically stealing from them.
Rule #5: The Consistency Rule
Sadly, many folks rank ethics on a sliding scale. It is as if they are being asked the question: “On a scale of 1 to 5, how ethical are you? 5 means completely ethical. 4 somewhat ethical. 3 averagely ethical. 2 hardly ethical. 1 never ethical.” It just doesn’t work that way. We’re either ethical or we’re not.
I’m not saying any of us are perfect. I’m not saying we never make mistakes. I’m not saying we never fail to meet our grand intentions. However, if I’m constantly lying to my employees, I don’t get to declare I’m ethical just because I’ve never lied to my customers. However, I’ll point out if you really think both of those statements are true, you’re probably lying to yourself. Just because you tell the truth the 95% of the time it won’t affect you adversely, you’re not mostly ethical. If you lie when backed into a corner, you’re not ethical.
Remember that this checklist is my checklist for determining if I’m ethical. I have no doubt everyone, no matter their view of spirituality, agrees with the rules I’ve listed so far. Some may not agree with this final rule because it will appear too Christian or Bible based. Sometimes we seem to have the idea that the Bible is for church not our professional lives. I can’t take the Bible out of any of my life. I will point out that if you have agreed with the above 5 rules, you have agreed with very Bible based rules. I have to share my sixth rule because these are my rules for determining if I’m being ethical. You may not want to follow this last one, but I assure you, it will make you ethical if you do.
Rule #6: The Bottom Line Rule
Most often, we associate the bottom line with money because that’s where the phrase originated. However, it has come to mean what is most important. If someone says, “The bottom line is…” we expect them to tell us the most important part of whatever they are sharing. For most folks, the bottom line does have to do with money. For some it has to do with fame. For others with influence and popularity. For some, the bottom line is receiving the credit or passing the blame.
For me, the bottom line comes directly from Matthew 6:33. “Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness.” I have to ask with every decision is this the next right thing? Is this what God would want me to do? That’s my bottom line. It doesn’t matter how much money it will make me or how famous it will make me. If I can’t be convinced God wants me to do it, then, for me, it just isn’t ethical.
Of course, to truly follow this rule, I have to go back to my honesty rule. It’s amazing the number of ways I can declare God wants me to do something and in the end I realize it was just me wanting to do it. But that is for another post–probably a Monday post.
There you have it. My six rules for determining if I’m acting ethically. I hope it helps you. I hope we can each make an individual difference in our work place, shining the light of ethical living for all to see and leading our business world away from the sad state of ethicless actions by placing doing good things above doing profitable things. In the end, I think we’ll find doing good is actually more profitable anyway.
Tired of having to wade through hundreds of e-mails that you just saved in your inbox because you knew you might someday need that tidbit of info and didn’t know what else to do with it or because you knew you needed to respond but weren’t sure when you would? Me too. Have I got the solution for you.
Yesterday I got to listen to a great podcast with guest Kelly Forister who works with David Allen, author of bestselling productivity book Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity
I am sick of having 40 or 50 e-mails in my inbox, knowing that somewhere in that list was an e-mail to which I still have to respond or that has some info I need to get to. Now I can get that inbox to zero every day and put the e-mails in a place that will help me be more productive.
The answer is one of those duh statements that left me asking, “Why haven’t I already thought of that?”
SUBFOLDERS
That’s right, subfolders.
Now, underneath INBOX, I have some subfolders that help me out. Kelly suggested three. 1) Action 2) Waiting For 3)Someday Maybe.
Of course, before filing in any of these folders, she suggests if the action required to respond to the e-mail takes less than 2 minutes, then just respond and get it over with. If it is going to take longer, then file it in these folders to help make tracking easier.
It is pretty self-explanatory. If the e-mail requires your action, then move it into the action folder. Make sure as you review your work, you check this folder. If the e-mail requires a response from you but you need something from someone else before you can respond, move it into the Waiting For folder. If it contains something you would like to look into maybe someday, then put it in that folder. That is for all those pesky e-mails that someone sends and you kind of want to read it, look at it, check the links, etc. but you don’t have time now and it is not that big of a priority, but someday when you have time, you’ll check it out. Don’t just leave it in the Inbox to clutter up all your stuff. Put it in a place that will help keep you sane.
I took this a step further. I have some specific areas in my life for which I get e-mails. For instance, I set up a folder where I can file all e-mails that I usually keep in my inbox because they give me info about the speaking engagements I have. As a minister, one of my works here is a questions and answers lesson that I do on those quarterly fifth Sundays. Now, when someone e-mails me a question, I don’t have to hunt through my entire inbox to see if I can find some of them. Instead, when I get them, I file them in that special folder and they are all in one place.
Of course, if the issue is the e-mail has some information in it like phone numbers or addresses. Make sure you just file that information in the right place immediately. Don’t leave it in your inbox so you can search for it six months from now (I hope my wife reads this, how many times have I had to search out a phone number for her by scrolling through months and months of e-mails?).
At this moment, my inbox is empty. My action e-mails are where I can find them. I know what I’m waiting on for a few others. I can easily find the info about my speaking engagements. I’m set.
Now to work on all my other issues of productivity. I’m definitely getting David Allen’s book and I’m looking forward to reading it.
My action folder says I have an article to write for a friend’s magazine. Guess I better get to that right now.
